Monday, July 16, 2007

Using Dreams

Since I have been in recovery for alcohol and drug addiction (1981) I have had, over the years, what are called "using dreams." For me, and others I have discussed this phenomenon with, it goes something like this. In the dream, I drink, I know that I am an alcoholic and that to control that, I do not drink, however there is always some sort of reason, justification, something that makes it "ok"...it wasn't my fault...or I just plain old drink...and then feel guilty and awful. Generally when I wake up after having one of these dreams, I am often confused about whether it was a dream or real. I feel disoriented and guilty and sometimes a little scared.

So, not surprisingly, I have had a few cigarette "using dreams" since I quite smoking in March, 2007. I would guess that I have probably had about 1 of these dreams per month. They are a little scary, kind of a wake-up call and later in the day, actually are mildly humorous.

Well...last night I had what must have been a "food using dream." I have been on a very strick low-carb diabetic diet since March. Last night I dreamed that I was eating (or was about to eat) MASHED POTATOES. There I was in my dream, defending my choice to eat this big, huge plate of Mashed Potatoes. (My previous food using dream from a month ago had something to do with M & M s....which are also not part of my new healthier lifestyle!)

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