Using Dreams

Since I have been in recovery for alcohol and drug addiction (1981) I have had, over the years, what are called "using dreams." For me, and others I have discussed this phenomenon with, it goes something like this. In the dream, I drink, I know that I am an alcoholic and that to control that, I do not drink, however there is always some sort of reason, justification, something that makes it "ok"...it wasn't my fault...or I just plain old drink...and then feel guilty and awful. Generally when I wake up after having one of these dreams, I am often confused about whether it was a dream or real. I feel disoriented and guilty and sometimes a little scared.

So, not surprisingly, I have had a few cigarette "using dreams" since I quite smoking in March, 2007. I would guess that I have probably had about 1 of these dreams per month. They are a little scary, kind of a wake-up call and later in the day, actually are mildly humorous.

Well...last night I had what must have been a "food using dream." I have been on a very strick low-carb diabetic diet since March. Last night I dreamed that I was eating (or was about to eat) MASHED POTATOES. There I was in my dream, defending my choice to eat this big, huge plate of Mashed Potatoes. (My previous food using dream from a month ago had something to do with M & M s....which are also not part of my new healthier lifestyle!)

I just read...

First book I have read in this futuristic suspense series. It was fun and light. I will probably read more.

I just read...

Memoir by Jeannette Walls tells of growing up in a majorly disfunctional family. I personally prefered THE GLASS CASTLE to LIAR'S CLUB by Mary Karr.

I just read...

An early novel by Jodi Picoult. The writing is not quite as smooth as it is in later books, but the story and character development had me from the start. I really wonder how I missed this wonderful author for such a long time!

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I just read...

Powerful, well written book. I had head about it, and checked it out of the library a couple of times before I actually got around to reading it, but I am glad I was persistant. Very good read.

I just watched...

It made for kind of an Angelina Jolie weekend, as she was also the second lead in GIRL, INTERRUPTED. But, I thought she did a good job with the title role in GIA.